So, you're American? I've never been in America before. Or in someone else's head....

But never mind that, I've got a question!

I-in America, you can walk inside with your shoes on, right?

[Oh please no-]

B-but what if you stepped in dog crap and walked inside the house?

[I'm gonna need you to stop now.]

And if your American Dad and American Mom and American Son and American Daughter all step in dog crap and walked in the house... your American house would get all dirty. And if American Boss came by and saw the house was dirty, would American Mom get fired? Or what if American Boss stepped in dog crap and got the house dirty? Would American Dad and Mom have to clean it up later or force American Son to clean it up? Would American Son and Daughter get in an argument about who should clean stuff up?

[Kill me.]