dear_mun | Differences of opinion

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Differences of opinion

These ideas of yours are... Why do you want me to do that? That's not-- I can't. With Berserker? How do you come up with these things?

[A pause. This is so awkward. He doesn't even want to say these things out loud.]

I hope that one never happens. [Another one that he's definitely not going to mention.] It's horrible. Yes, I do know what you're thinking. You know that I'm not interested. I don't want to do anything romantic. Or--worse. [Well, maybe with Aoi, but that's different. It's not as if he never thinks about these things, but still, there are degrees.]

It's bad enough that I'm still under that curse, and that I'm going to die. Again.

I have to get home and get back to the war. That's what I care about. I can't waste time on feelings that aren't important.

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Well, at least Mr. Berserker doesn't have cooties?

[Oh look, it's one very familiar looking kid.]

Oh. Lancer?

[Oh no, it's a familiar kid, but this isn't suitable talk for children, is it?]

Cooties? No, that's true. He doesn't. I think we're getting along, but...

[Still so awkward.]

But we're just friends.

[He guesses they're friends. It's complicated.]

Oh. I've heard that sometimes you can go from friends to super-special friends...

[Not that he understands what that entails. He's not a pervert yet.]

But even if you don't, it's great that you have a friend, Mister.

That's true. You can, sometimes, if you're very lucky. But Berserker and I aren't that kind of friend.

[No matter what some people think, they're not.]

We're very different.

I have made a few friends. So I guess I am lucky, in that way.

[He gives a quick nod.]

Then do you have any friends you really like in that way?

[Tiny Lancer, why are you asking him these questions?? He can't talk to children about his romance problems.]

I do, yes. I have a best friend. But I haven't seen her in a while.

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Boys can't do that sort of thing together. You'll have to get a woman involved.

[ Rin's views are no way associated with her player's views for the record. Especially since her's are incredibly flawed (it's alright for Saber and her, but not her uncle and his Servant?). ]

Rin--!

[He really didn't mean for her to see this.]

A--woman? [Rin, what are you saying?] We're not going to. I don't need anyone involved. That's not going to happen.

[Your uncle has enough trouble with twosomes, threesomes are a bit advanced for him.]

I'm not doing anything. I haven't. Not really.

[ Don't worry Kariya.

If Rin can get Shirou Emiya involved in a threesome, you're a cinch. ]

Well, do you want to? It'd be troublesome to oversee it, but I'd have to make sure no one was treating you poorly.

[Are you sure about that?]

Well, I--

[He is VERY UNCERTAIN about this conversation.]

I'm fine with the way things are. That's not something I can do. Don't trouble yourself, Rin.

[Please.]

[ Challenge accepted. ]

I said it wouldn't be trouble, just troublesome. Isn't there a law against it, but oh if fathers can give sexual advice to their daughters, I suppose it's alright if it's the other way around.

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Actually, Rin...

[ Leering. ] Archer, is there something you've failed to tell your doting Master all this time?

I don't know. It depends on whether you recall meeting Issei Ryuudou...

Wha-? You know about that loser?

Of course I know about that drab idiot, but he's not worth bringing up in my presence.

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and done.

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not here

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also not here

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still not here

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[In which Lancelot is a bit affronted! And a bit thick in the head, as well.]

With all there is for you to fear, Master, and all you have been tested against, I hardly think Romance is the most terrifying of circumstances.

Though, I will say that you surprise me, Master. I had thought that we had progressed in our relationship beyond the point where you might think of such a prospect with your Servant as "horrible".

I shall Win the War for you. If that is all you Wish of me, then so be it.

[His luck just keeps getting worse. Berserker. That is, Lancelot.]

No, that isn't what I meant. You're not horrible. That wouldn't be horrible. That was something else they were thinking of, with someone else. [Because his player is a horrible person who thinks horrible things.] I'm sure it wouldn't be horrible at all with you. [How does he say this without making things worse?] I'm sure it would be-- nice.

[Nice? Did he just say that?]

Romance isn't the worst thing that could happen, but it's not something I want. [Yes, it is.]

I know. We're going to win the war together.

[Kariya is flustered, that much is obvious. Painfully so. It is a bit endearing, the way the man humiliates himself and yet insists on being recognized. At least, Lancelot has come to find it so.

Though he is still a trifle annoyed.

And yes, Kariya just said that.]

Yes, we shall.

But who, then, is this other whose prospect you find horrible? You have not spoken of this to me.
Surely it cannot the Lady Aoi.

[Yes, his Master truly lacks any desire Romance.]

Aoi? No, of course not. That wouldn't be horrible at all.

[That would be a beautiful and amazing thing that he doesn't even dare to dream of. Kariya: sure doesn't like romance!]

It's someone else who isn't in the tower. There's no point speaking about it. It's not going to happen. [It had better not.]

[Things Kariya doesn't like: Romance, his Handsome Servant, weirdo Priests.]

I can sense that the idea fills you will many emotions, Master -- not all of which are "horror".
But we shall speak of it no more, if you wish it.

Concerning the other matter, I will say that you have the right of it.
If such a thing were to come to pass, you may rest assured it would indeed be "nice".

[Is Lancelot hitting on you? Maybe.]

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[ Oh. This topic again. Cecil is very familiar with the subject of romantic pairings, thanks to her mun. She sighs and her lips turn downward in a frown. ]

While I disagree that such emotions are insignificant, I am sorry that you were not spared from Diarmuid's curse, let alone from being placed in similarly uncomfortable situations.

[ Because MEMES. ]

[So is Kariya, sadly.]

The curse... Yes. The curse.

[Sigh. It's still causing him problems, because of his Matou-rank luck.]

Thank you. That's kind of you.

I don't think they're insignificant if they're for someone you really love. Then they're the most important thing in the world. That's different.

[ What's that phrase they use sometimes? Shippers gonna ship. ]

I'm not certain I understand. Should not the man who serves you unconditionally and fights for you without hesitation be worthy of such love? Perhaps it is because I do not know the inner workings of your contract or the Holy Grail War, but your logic seems flawed and unfair to me.

[That they do.]

He serves me because he has to, not because he wants to. It's not about love. He didn't always follow my orders. [He can still vividly remember the pain of commanding Berserker, the fearsome pull of Berserker's disobedience tearing through his body.] It's true, things are better now, between us. We get along.

But there's--

[He hesitates.]

--there's already someone I love. I don't want to be unfaithful to her.

[Not that he's in a relationship with her or anything like that.]

[ Ah, suddenly things make more sense. However, not knowing that Kariya isn't in fact actually in a relationship, Cecil speaks out of bounds again: ]

Forgive me— I did not realize. Your fidelity to her is admirable and I didn't mean to imply otherwise. Your mun should respect then that you wish to remain an honorable partner to her.

[ And again... ]

I will... continue to insist that mine not cause the two of us to break the promises we made to our lovers together.

[ ...and again. ]

Though if I may be frank, from what I witnessed that day in the Tower, the fealty Lancelot gives you does not seem to be given out of necessity as much as you claim.

[ Well... "shippers gonna ship", indeed— even when they're unexpected shippers. ]

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